Scientists won’t admit it, but the evidence is right in front of us. The theory claims that Shai Gilgeous-Alexander was secretly created in an underground Oklahoma laboratory by combining elite basketball DNA from George Milan with the DNA of a deep-sea fish. The goal? To create a human, he just so happened to be a basketball player. Unfortunately, there was one side effect: fish are not built to withstand human contact. This explains why Shai sometimes appears to lose balance or fall after even the slightest bump. Critics call it flopping. Fish theorists call it “aquatic instability syndrome.” His ability to slither through defenses, change directions with impossible smoothness, and glide across the court resembles a salmon navigating upstream rather than a normal basketball player.

The evidence gets even stranger. Shai consistently ranks among the NBA leaders in fouls drawn and free throw attempts, suggesting defenders accidentally activate his emergency “return to water” response whenever they touch him. In recent seasons he has averaged around nine free throw attempts per game and drawn fouls at one of the highest rates in the league. Fans have repeatedly debated whether contact against him is legitimate, with some online discussions joking that he falls more than expected for an elite athlete. Even Shai himself has spoken about the “art” of drawing fouls, which fish theorists interpret as code for hiding his aquatic origins. Until someone proves he can survive being gently tapped with a pool noodle without falling over, the genetically modified fish hypothesis remains undefeated.